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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

ASK LAUREN


Hello internets! Riddle me this:

1. Do you have questions? Things that plague you? Problems with roommates, boyfriends, wives, mothers, coworkers, strangers, dogs, etc.?
2. Would you like someone to help you with those problems?

You are in luck! I am starting a new section of i go right for the blogular, called ASK LAUREN. It is, how do you say, an advice column. It has come to my attention that I am awesome and give great advice. Or, at the very least, I give funny advice. I can go either way with it. If I don't give you real advice, I'll give you funny advice.

Example:

Question: I am throwing a dinner party and I want to invite only a select group of friends. There's one couple that I don't want to invite, but they're friends with everyone else. Should I suck it up and invite them or not? If not, what do I say?

Funny Answer: Why don't you like them? Are they tools? If so, just tell them that you don't like tools in your house. End of discussion.

Real Answer: You can just suck it up and invite them if you think it would be less trouble. If you see them on a regular basis, this might be the most agreeable option. But if you don't see them often, you can get away with not inviting them. You could tell the others invited that this is a small event and you don't have the space to invite everyone. Or you could just not address it at all and assume that everyone will be an adult about it.

I am not an expert on really anything, but I can pretend to be. Or point you in the right direction. Or Google it. But then again, if I can Google it, so can you, so don't bother me with that shit.

So send me some questions! You can leave them as comments to this post, anonymously or not, or send them to me at laurenwthompson [at] gmail [dot] com.

5 comments:

Melita said...

this is great. i'll have to think of some questions to ask.

aferraro said...

what music are you listening to these days? reading?

i will come up with more questions...

Julie said...

Thompson (can I still call you that?), I totally vouch to the internet that you give great advice! I salute your new endeavor.

Carolyn said...

LOL. I can just hear you saying the Funny Answer. HAHA

Brian in AK said...

Okay, Lauren, how's this?

We have this really pushy neighbor. She totally tells us what we should be doing and how we should be doing it. She is really generous, but she gives us things we don't really want or can't use. She would be mostly friendly if she wasn't so pushy, and Stephanie wants to make sure we are on good terms with the neighbors. I really can't stand her, but recognize we wouldn't want her for an enemy. How to handle her intrusions into our business?

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